Friday, November 25, 2011

Game Over!!!

I lost the game. I realize that now. All the cards were played and I lost. I am not sure if you won or we just both lost. Maybe it was a no-win situation, or maybe... maybe. But it is done, it was done long ago and it is still done now.

So why am I writing about it again? Why do I keep thinking of and about you? Why do I keep remembering?

I realized it today. I fell for you. I fell in lo ve with you.

And falling out of lo ve from you; well that is the difficult part. I knew I liked you a lot, but I just recognized it, I fell in lo ve with you.

How can falling in lo ve translate to losing? to game over?

It was worth it, this is not about regretting falling for you. But it is about how I feel broken now, like a part of me is missing and I wonder if I'll ever lo ve again, will I ever be loved again? That is for me a game over, a lost game.

I mi ss yo U in my life. I mi ss walking the streets with you, laughing about Vodka, Giggles and Shy boy, about random coffee names and about our camping adventures. It aches every time I tell a story about us, because I have to disguise my feelings and our relationship. You became a friend and in stead of being funny it hurts. Daydreaming, night-dreaming and movie-dreaming is pain, pure pain.

It is not like it used to be, that everything I am reminds me of you. No, it hurts different. Because I ache for what it was, what it isn't and what it will never become.

Your friend, who became my friend said to me when talking about our broken path:
  • "its okay though
    i think its honestly his lose
    :) you will always find better." 
    I know or I hope there is truth in his words and it helped eased the pain, but still there was no winner and the game is over...

Mexican Thanksgiving Friday!

This is my first Thanksgiving in Mexico, and I am really excited for all the food we cooked, it all tastes delicious. I know we are a day off, but it doesn't really matter, I am happy we get to eat this amazing food! :)

Here is the Friday linking up with Lauren from the little things we do

1.   Waking up at the break of dawn to go shopping is my idea of    a dream, hearing black friday stories is enough for me!   .

2.   If I were to go shopping today I would be on the hunt for   I don't really have anything in mind, but I could always buy more camera equipment or shoes :)      .

3.  The best thing I ate yesterday was    since I am back in Mexico, and my family doesn't really have the Thanksgiving tradition, I convinced them to have one for our Friday dinners, so I am really excited, everything is ready and it tastes delicious!     .

4. Something I've been learning lately is   who to trust and how much trust can you put on them   .

5.  I cannot start my day without    showering, it takes me time to really wake up! haha, I have a slow start, I can do a lot of thing in the morning, but most likely I will be half asleep!  .

6.  My nighttime attire consists of   tank top, long pants and sweater! .

7.  I am looking forward to   traveling, but not packing! hahaha  .

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

I am loving this Wednesday!

So this Wednesday I've been hit with a terrible anxiety, and I don't really know why, or maybe I do but my consciousness doesn't want to deal with it right now... So let's get distracted!!!

I am linking up with Jamie from the blog This Kind of Love and here it goes, What I'm Loving Wednesday...

I'm loving this Twitter thing, when you ask actual information, like traffic, and seconds later someone there has the answer!!!

I'm loving being able to watch tv series online, although I hate that I see them faster than they appear!

I'm loving writing more often on my blog! It helps me get things out of my chest.

I'm loving this City Girl life I have now!


and you what are you loving?

Friday, November 18, 2011

Mexican Friday!

This is the second Friday back in Mexico and the settling in has been good but tough.
Life is though but sometimes we have more challenges than other times.

Here is the Friday linking up with Lauren from the little things we do

1.   A nervous habit I have is  to crack my fingers. horrible habit, and I have been able to stop it for a while, but when hell runs lose it comes back.

2.   Something that makes me sad is the pain in the world. I know it sound generic and common, but it is something that keeps me looking for ways to help. Starting on my own backyard.

3.  Today I am thankful for  the support from my family and friends to settle in and to be comfortable and happy. I know I've said it a million times, but without it nothing would have been possible.

4. My favorite room in my house is  it used to be my studio but since it is being remodeled now my room is the favorite one, it is the one I spend more time in, all my stuff and desk and everything is here!

5.  I can't stand  part of my extended family. I am sorry I wished it was different but if you give no love you can't receive anything from me.

6.  If I had an extra $100 to spend on whatever I wanted today I would  my first thought was save it for my next trip, but knowing me I would probably would go and buy shoes! ;)

7.  The last person I hung out with was  my sister and brother in law, we went to see (yes, guilty) the new twilight movie, which was a disappointment but I lo ve going with them!

Have an amazing extended Mexican weekend! or a regular weekend on the rest of the world!

This is fun and you should try it too!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

What I'm Loving Wednesday!

Since I discovered this link up activity I have tried to be constant and search for different ones, and as often say there is no try either you do or you don't. (I would attribute it, but I am not sure where I got it from, I've heard from Yoda, but haven't watched the movies...)...
Anyway I discovered this one a while back but I kept going to it every day except Wednesdays, so it was difficult to be part of it.... BUT finally it is Wednesday and I am here and here it goes.

I am linking up with Jamie from the blog This Kind of Love and here it goes, What I'm Loving Wednesday...

I'm loving that tomorrow I have an amazing opportunity to photograph one of the Mexican congressman at the Congress.

I'm loving the extraordinary support from my family and friends to settle in this Old New City for me!

I'm loving my new wardrobe because I get to be the City Girl I've always wanted to be!

I'm loving the WhatsApp because it keeps me in immediate touch with my friends around the world. Whom I mi ss mu ch ..

I'm loving all this linking up experiences!

and I'm loving the happy days!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

I did not miss high school

I don't miss high school. I was happy when I was there but I was happier when it ended and I moved on to University.

I was done with high school then as I am now.

I still keep 2 good friends and some good acquaintances; because of that I have to go to parties and reunions that I would rather avoid, because I don't want to go back in time to that time, or bring that time now.

Unlike most of them I searched for my world outside those 4 walls, and those were not the happiest of my life. I was happy and I accomplished everything I wanted, but that was it and I rather be here now.

Because of who I am and how I am, I was kind of an outsider, part but not really part of them. And I don't belong there now either.

It is interesting falling in a place that you rather not be in, or better if it was different.

I respect the people whose friends are from high school, but I am not one of them. I have 2 friends from that stage of my life, and going with them places means being with their high school circle of friends, people that were not my friends and not my acquaintances, so it feels like being in high school and I don't like that feeling.

I haven't missed high school for a second in my life.